Parting Shot

After travelling on the Team Singapore bus, the young table tennis protégés had a knockabout with the island’s top paddlers.

Except for Ken.

As Xiao Li was ill, he played against an old uncle—and lost.

Half-recognising the man, Ken asked, “Uncle, you ex-professional?”

“No,” he replied. “I drive bus!”

Burning Ambition

As a child, Maria watched her neighbour’s house burn down.

“Wow—those firefighters are awesome. I’m gonna be one.”

Today, wherever there’s a major fire in the city, she’s right there with them.

As they extinguish what she started.

Post-Holiday Blues... And Greens

It hit Alex as soon as he put his suitcases down—the stench.

It came from the dishes that he’d neglected to wash before going on holiday.

They were half-covered in a blue-green, furry mould.

"Great!" he thought.

And set to work on revolutionising the medical world.  

By discovering penicillin.

Fair game?

Growing up on a farm, Jack loved rabbits—especially in pies.

So when a rabbit appeared in his garden, Jack soon grabbed it.

And threw it into a sack, where it hopped like mad.

Struggling with the  sack, Jack saw some new neighbours moving in.

Carrying an empty rabbit hutch.

A Woman Scorned

It was a trial separation—until Colin sent Jane the divorce papers.

Shocked, Jane went to see Colin.

He wasn’t in but his car was there.

With ‘Colin ♥ Cecilia’ emblazoned across the windscreen.

Jane ran her wedding ring along the bonnet.

And scratched the words, ‘DIVORCE GRANTED’.

Mary's Regular

When the coast was clear, Joe went into the brothel.

‘Hello young man,’ said the receptionist. ‘Here for Mary?’’

Joe nodded.

‘She’s expecting you. Room 6.’

‘Thanks,’ said Joe,

Inside Room 6, Mary was sat on the bed, buttoning up her blouse.

‘Hi Joe,’ said Mary.

‘Hi Mum,’ replied Joe.

Rich Pickings

Every day after work, Pete pushed a wheelbarrow home. 

The factory guard always checked to see what was in it—but only ever found sawdust.

“It’s good for the compost,” Pete would say.

The guard always apologised, ”You can’t be too careful these days.”

“I know,” Pete would think. ”Especially with wheelbarrows!”

A Lost Weekend

Max was in heaven.

Eating junk food, sleeping all day, hanging out with pimps and drug dealers…

Until the police finally caught up with him.

And escorted him straight back to where he belonged.

At home.

In his kennel.

Third-Time Lucky?

James’ third driving test was going well.

He’d answered every question correctly, driven well and followed the instructor’s requests to the letter.

As they headed back to the test centre, they approached a small intersection with a garden bed as a roundabout

‘Which way?’ asked James.

‘Straight across, please.’

The Big Day

Ben rose early and read his cards and messages. 

After his favourite breakfast, he took a short stroll—chatting to neighbours along the way.

When he sat down, there was a flurry of activity. 

A switch was flicked. 

And Ben was executed.

Getting One Across

Larry loved cryptic crosswords.

In his local café, he’d insist on using clues to order—which infuriated the staff.

One day, after he asked for ‘gegs (9,4)’, a waitress brought him his scrambled eggs.

And said, “I’ve got one for you, Larry: Postman’s mailbag.”

“Great," replied Larry. "How many letters?”

“Thousands!”

New School Blues

George hated his new school.

The building was rundown, the kids were unruly and the teachers were awful to him.

One morning, despite his mum’s pleas, he refused to get ready for school.

Until his dad went into the bedroom and said, “You have to go, son. You’re the headmaster.


The Wager

A married couple are sat at a table.

In silence.

Until two houseflies land nearby.

“I bet you the left one moves first,” says one.

“You’re on!” says the other.


The wife then shoos away both flies—who disappear at exactly the same time.

“I win!” says the first fly.

Hickory Dickory Clocked!

Hickory Dickory Dock.


Three mice ran up the clock.

The clock struck one.

And the other two escaped with minor injuries.
 
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