New School Blues

George hated his new school.

The building was rundown, the kids were unruly and the teachers were awful to him.

One morning, despite his mum’s pleas, he refused to get ready for school.

Until his dad went into the bedroom and said, “You have to go, son. You’re the headmaster.


The Wager

A married couple are sat at a table.

In silence.

Until two houseflies land nearby.

“I bet you the left one moves first,” says one.

“You’re on!” says the other.


The wife then shoos away both flies—who disappear at exactly the same time.

“I win!” says the first fly.

Hickory Dickory Clocked!

Hickory Dickory Dock.


Three mice ran up the clock.

The clock struck one.

And the other two escaped with minor injuries.
 
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